I have constant desires though situation changes and sometimes I get more selfish or human, I love my children too much to put my desire for comfort above what they need. In that light, my wishes are plain. Now, how to make them be.
I'll just toss this out there, it is a dangling singular thought: living so far from any family, freezing cold, without a piano or a car and so many other things I need to do the things that would bring me peace of mind is nearly unbearable. It is comparable to throwing away Nick's computer and then wrecking his car. Do not worry, I would never do that.
I was thinking and I believe that the reason I recovered as well as I did was because I was taking steps towards improvement, by now I should be running and singing. I thought that was going to happen when Nick got the priesthood he would be able to bless me and now I think that was selfish.
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