Couldn't take it

Briefly, I wanted to fall back asleep but found out that this is a new stage in my life where I cannot bear the songs stinging my mind with it's verbal barbs. Mostly, I worried that if I was so influenced consciously, What the heck would happen if I heard such ideas in my dreams?

Dickens

Now, that my mind paused long enough to consider the relationship between Joseph Smith and Walt Disney, I have moved on to speculate about Charles Dickens...and Victor Hugo, no, just Charles Dickens.

At Christmas time, I ought to be pondering the great truths expounded in the bedtime story called, " A Christmas Carol " but, I keep wondering what the significance of reading "Great Expectations" in my college literature class.

Things I pondered is how we compared a convict to Christ and how I made an off hand comment in a predominately Baptist class something I had considered true about the crucifixion. I was asked by the teacher to provide a reference from acceptable scripture to corroborate my statement.

But, the common thing of all my speculations is the marketing at why Mr. Dickens would have been in such a frame of mind to create his great works.

I love the whole premise of Great Expectations, to me, it is very much like having faith. In the novel our hero honestly believed something to be, and such a belief dictates his actions. In scripture, we learn that evidence comes after the trial of our faith. Well, what if that evidence is not what was expected?

Also, I had always considered the curious wording of what is called "The Book of Mormon Promise" ask yourself if the thing is NOT true. I suppose that dares to suggest something might not be true. Never fear though, cause something are true and you will know, or no longer just believe or speculate or have Great Expectations.

That much never changes

I have constant desires though situation changes and sometimes I get more selfish or human, I love my children too much to put my desire for comfort above what they need. In that light, my wishes are plain. Now, how to make them be.

I'll just toss this out there, it is a dangling singular thought: living so far from any family, freezing cold, without a piano or a car and so many other things I need to do the things that would bring me peace of mind is nearly unbearable. It is comparable to throwing away Nick's computer and then wrecking his car. Do not worry, I would never do that.

Checkmate

I really hate to ruin this, I know that you read this, though. I am tired of thinking every move several times ahead, so it must end.

Abraham

I am going to become who I intended. Things needed to be impossible to be, and though it seems unfair, I see the mercy and intended kindness. Both come from and may be seen through eyes of love.

I was looking at a picture, and wondered if you would consider Parsley.

Anxiety

I understand leaving prematurely. I am that way, too. Better to leave while you can than risk not getting the chance at all, but do you have any idea the anxiety it causes me. In the words of Catherine Earnshaw, "You always followed me." And I struggle to catch up and honestly do not know where I get the strength to keep fighting, it almost seems I will overcome insurmountable odds to catch you but, you move ever quickly away. Is it a paradox? Like needing to gain a half way markbefore you overtake something, but there is an ever ammount of half way marks to reach making it impossible to ever really catch you, still I try because, for some reason, I think you are worth it. Talk about faith... Gavin once said that he believed in me. I was laughing because I told him that I was right there, of course I exsist. I understood a bit more while watching "Rise of the Gaurdians" How ideas get power by those who believe in them, like "Anonymous" where it was acknowledged that words are really power. I used to marvel at court scenes in Law and Order how just words could change my opinion or perspective.

It was really more of an "Inception" notion though that once thought, it could never be unthought.

And I got it. My source of never ending energy is love. Through love anything can be done. God is love and for God nothing is impossible.

One side of the conversation

Yes.

I am impressed at the complexity of it all, and wonder if there is so much more that I am not able to comprehend yet, because My awareness,now affords me to understand things that seemed mysterious.

Yes, I noticed that and recognized your hand in things, but that does not imply that I know anything and I certainly do not believe the things I catch.

If I may speak now, I wonder what the value or entertainment value of suspense is. Why are things that are waited for increased in value?

Yes, I realize time is a unique concept to each conciever.

If you must know, it is my memory.

(Much later)
Yep. I am almost always here. You know.

I thought about you and many unrealistic things. Can I ask something now?

Well, as The thoughts were coming, I felt like they clicked too easily and came more quickly than I normally comprehend. So, I wondered of their origin, a lot like that kid who believed that he was another reincarnated or something. I'm just me, but who exactly are you?

Ofcourse, search me everythy thought and feeling. I am an open book, only so many do not have the cipher.

Yes, I have heard of that. It all sounded a bit silly to me, Though. Then again, most things seem funny to me.

I knew you were mighty, but I just am me.

Oh, I definately suspected as much.

But, I could not figure out a reason, and to be reasonable requires a reason.